Friday, October 19, 2007

Welcome to the florescent jungle.

After much groveling, the Unincorporated Middle agreed to let me to contribute something relatively non-political to her fine blog. With that, I bring you Friday’s Florescent Jungle, a weekly discussion of all things corporate from someone who recently realized that she now spends more time in a cubicle than outside of one.

Anyone who works in a cubicle environment can relate to the NBC show “The Office” in some regard. Every office has its characters and its quirks. But I actually feel like I live it, day in and day out, and I feel like I interact with many of the characterizations portrayed on the show on a daily basis. There’s the boss, let’s call him Bert, who goes out of his way to make everyone like him. The “Assistant to the Regional Manager,” Bertha, who upholds the tenets spelled out in the Employee Manual as if it were Gospel. The crazy cat woman, or women, who talk about their cats as if they were children. And even a hard-working prankster who, before leaving for greener pastures, conspired and flirted with a young assistant, yours truly, much to the chagrin of their office mates.

But if I were to create my own version of “The Office,” I’d have to add a few new character types:

Island Stan, the little man with a penchant for hard living, big women, Bob Marley and rum and an unhealthy preoccupation with death.

Trudy, a twenty-something woman who wears a parka 365 days a year, dries her socks with a hair dryer, puts an air freshener on her desk and gets into inane, 45 minute conversations about things like area codes and electric rates.

The IT Geek, who thinks that the NFL should reinstate Michael Vick because of the joy and excitement he brings to football.

And the Old Joe, who has sacrificed most of his life to the company and feels comfortable doing and saying just about anything he wants while still being the most productive member of the company.

After spending more than five years with these characters, I’ve decided to share my stories with the blogosphere. And if I happen to veer off topic into a discussion of the most recent episode of “The Hills,” or a rant about my latest public transportation mishap, so be it.

Welcome to the florescent jungle.

1 comment:

Unincorporated Middle said...

I thought we needed a little real world wackiness to complement the usual political wackiness found here, not to mention a younger perspective. So I'll be featuring tales from the Flourescent Jungle every Friday, with the occaisional special report. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

And a note to "your's truly" -
what a great start! Can't wait 'til the next installment.